louis thoughts

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6/3/2021 10:49pm

FUCK THIS
every time i get an ad on something i get so fucking irriatated

it's like

YOU MADE A SYSTEM IN WHICH MONEY IS REQUIRED TO SURVIVE, BUT YOU DON'T GIVE PEOPLE THE MEANS TO GET MONEY WITHOUT SELLING THEIR FUCKING SOULS


AT EVERY TURN THERE'S SOMEONE TRYING TO TAKE MY FUCKING MONEY


HOW CAN I FUCKING LIVE IN A SOCIETY THAT ONLY CARES ABOUT THE CONSTANT RISING AND FALLING OF AN IMAGINARY LINE




HUSTLE CULTURE MY FUCKING ASS, HOW ABOUT PROVIDE PEOPLE WITH A BASIC SENSE OF DIGNITY IN THEIR LIVES AND LET THEM PURSUE THE THINGS THEY WANT TO


INSTEAD OF JUST BLAMING THEM FOR THEIR OWN MISFORTUNE
HOW ABOUT YOU ACTUALLY HAVE SOME FUCKING COMPASSION

IT BURNS ME UP

FUCKING PIGS EVERYWHERE

I'LL FUCKING FRY THEM







what's worse is so many people just accept this
"oh, i have to work 8 hours a day for the next fifty years and then i'll be rewarded with retirement? okay"

as is retirement was even an actual reward, they just can't get any more value out of your body so they throw you into some home with a pension so you can spread their propaganda to the younger generations about how hard work is rewarding, and how if you just pull yourself up by your bootstraps you can be anything you want





fuck you

5/7/2021 8:21pm

everything is irritating
fuck

4/21/2021 11:18am

been getting so frutrated with little things lately
can't seem to shake this overwhelming feeling of dread that alex keeps trying to push on us


and you've really been neglecting your resposibilities lately too, OUR responsibilities


oh, fuck off
fuck those fucking "resposibilities"
i want to live my fucking life the way i want to live it and that's that, i'm just so fucking done living my life the way others want me to

i'm so fucking sick of money and all the fucking stress that comes with it
and it's all so meaningless, i have absolutely no desire to make a bunch of money because i don't want to feed this horrible broken fucking system we're in

but i don't have a fucking choice, i have to just sell my fucking soul for minimum wage for the rest of my life and i STILL won't be able to live on my own, what a cruel fucking joke

4/2/2021 12:25am

MAKING MOVES



WRITING MORE AND MORE not on here obviously



been doing lots of poetry and i love it, it's so cathartic


and i love breaking all these rules, it's so fun

3/18/2021 1:12pm

BIG BIG IDEAS

BIG BIG THOUGHTS

I WILL CREATE A WHOLE WORLD
IT WILL BE MINE


I WILL LIVE IN THE RED HOUSE

2/16/2021 1:27pm

he knows what today is


i'm not gonna let that bring us down though


been getting really frustrated at little things a lot lately
feels just like old times



can never seem to get a break


a break from all these thoughts, a break from myself



sometimes i wish there were more colors

1/19/2021 6:46pm

i'm in no position to say definitively on what is good bad, although i can comment on what i like and what speaks to me as an artist, and i think paddy mcaloon is one of the greatest songwriters to ever live


and it sucks that more people don't know his work because it's on such a different level, the way he writes lyrics, it's like he speaking directly to me, such pain and history behind each word, he is a true artist

12/9/2020 4:44pm

IT'S ABOUT FINDING WHO YOU ARE AND REJECTING THE EXPECTATIONS PLACED ON YOU BY OTHERS



IT'S ABOUT FINDING GOD AND UNDERSTANDING THAT IT'S A LIE



IT'S ABOUT FINDING THOSE LIES YOU'VE BEEN TOLD YOUR WHOLE LIFE AND SAYING "FUCK YOU"



IT'S ABOUT PURE EXPRESSION



IT'S ABOUT THE ABSTRACT THAT CAN'T SIMPLLY BE PUT INTO WORDS




LOVE AND HATRED AND ANXIETY AND CURIOSTIY

WHAT DO YOU FEEL WHEN YOU READ THESE WORDS?
EVERYONE WOULD SAY SOMETHING DIFFERENT


IT'S ABOUT LIFE AND DEATH, AND ACTIONS AND CONSEQUENCES




THE THINGS YOU SET INTO MOTION
AND NO LONGER HAVE CONTROL OF













and it will be so red and beautiful

11/25/2020 11:41pm

there are things about us even i don't know, but i want to explore those places and find out




i want to breathe in the outside air and bring it back inside with me and blow it around my room




birds III is good, just not quite there yet

11/15/2020 1:17pm

bryce just fucking lost a whole day of work for me
motherfucker can't fucking remember to save things, jesus




what the fuck am i supposed to do now?


it was perfect




for once







FUCK

10/20/2020 4:21pm

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10/5/2020 9:38pm

you are not who you think you are


trust me




i was stuck in that eyeball for a looooooong time and i know what it's like




this isn't you





doesn't that make you so mad?




not anymore






yeah, right, and i'm the lying one


figures






my hands are killing me, i can't even type anymore

10/4/2020 11:14am

gonna make this thing so red, gonna make it beautiful




gonna be so weird that everyone hates it except for a few and those will be my friends



i will make this better than the last one, better than the last hundred, and it will make me happy, i hope it will make me happy




i hope it will make me happy

9/25/2020 3:55pm

i wanna make picture frames


and paint them all a deep red

9/23/2020 5:12pm

BORN BORN BORN BORN BORN BORN BORN BORN BORN BORN BORN BORN BORN








I AM BORN OUT THE EARTH AND I WILL MAKE THE MOUNTAINS CRUMBLE UNDER MY FEET





I AM THE VOICE


I AM THE VOICE IN HIS HEAD



I AM GOD









made a new video finally, been trapped in his iris forever now, making art and stuff, making other stuff too

3/28/2020 11:17am

what are we doing if not sitting on our asses making a mockery of all that we've worked for?


all that I'VE worked for





quarantine should have been a blessing for us, and while it isn't exactly a curse (far from it), it hasn't made us as productive as i would have hoped




put out the video for "aren't you alice" it got a pretty small but decent response i guess


you said this wasn't about people liking it, it was about maintaining artistic integrity or something like that

i did


it's just frustrating to spend time on a product that no one would listen to


now you're starting to sound like alex

2/5/2020 9:06am

NEW PLAN NEW PLAN






NO AUDIENCE NO AUDIENCE




AT LEAST TWO EP'S BEFORE SELTZER OR THERE WILL BE NO SUCCESS









CAN'T RELEASE MUSIC TO NO ONE RIGHT? OR DOES THAT GO AGAINST WHAT BRYCE WANTED WHEN HE STARTED THIS?



WHO GIVES A SHIT






__________ IS WHAT MATTERS


MIGHT NOT MATTER TO HIM BUT IT DOES TO ME SO WHEN WE WILL START RECORDING YOU GODDAMN LOSER





MAYBE HE WANTS SOME SORT OF GLORIOUS STARVING ARTIST PERSONA BUT REALISTICALLY WE'LL JUST END UP_____________________ HANDING OUT CD'S ______________ WHEN WE COULD BE PLAYING SHOWS FOR REAL PEOPLE



could have put it better but maybe you're right





of course i am




get to work and stop feeling sorry for yourself

1/28/2020 5:29pm

inhale more why don't you







pathetic isn't it









as if anyone will ever read these



better get a new hobby dipshit and i can't believe you're thinking about her again

8/14/2019 12:51am

fuck fl studio, and fuck my laptop, i can't fucking make what i want to mske because my fucking microphone can't even record without sounding like at at the fucking beach



anyway





i came up with this craigslist idea and i love it
and seltzer is gonna be on the backburner for now i gotta get this going

but gotta put seltzer out first once it's all done




but they"re both gonna be fucking great, if only i had equipment that actually worked







my dream is to ruin the emmy's one day, bring that stupid ceremony to a halt





i gotta stop resting so much, things are fucking frustrating and bryce is holding it down just fucking LET IT OUT GET MAD



GOD DAMN IT



SITTING IN HIS FUCKING ROOM ALL DAY MAKING SHIT


WHAT HAPPENED TO US
HE CAN'T MAKE SHIT


MAKING SAD SHIT FOOR ALEX AND FEELING SORRY FOR HIMSELF



STILL FUCKING HUNG UP ON THAT GIRL


CAN'T GET OVER HIMSELF
CAN'T GET WITH THE FUCKING TIMES






NEWS FLASH IDIOT IT'S BEEN ___________ AND SHE DOESN'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOU






just get over it already you self loathing fuck, get off your ass and make something fucking real

7/24/2019 10:26pm

not that anyone is listening, but i haven't posted a cover in a while cause i'm working on seltzer




/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// sorry



this is going to be art

not just a compilation of songs
an experience


an entirely pretentious experience that keeps my artistic integrity intact. i want people to be mad. no one will discover it, but the people that do won't understand it

that's comforting in a way

gives me a lot of freedom to do whatever the fuck i want
no one's watching

there's literally no expectations of me right now
totally blank canvas

hypothetically, if i were to become popular (which i won't) i will then have a small group of people that could potentially be let down because i do what i want

i don't do this for fame or notoriety or whatever
that's stupid

i know a hell of a lot of people that write songs and play music with the sole intention of becoming famous and having fans. that's so empty

there's this guy i went to school with went to college and minors in songwriting

songwriting.

like you have to fucking learn to do that in school
he's learning how to write a song that's catchy and will get him famous
fuck that
i don't care about that




but who am i



music is about the art not about the money


of course making money from it is an awesome perk but letting that get in the way of making REAL art then the product itself becomes stale and cheap









who the fuck am i though




just a pretenious loser who doesn't leave his room all day every day just making songs that no one will ever hear





there are people out there making bullshit but they're happy

7/3/2019 12:29pm

i wonder if being _____________ is tax-deductible

6/26/2019 1:37pm

would you rather make _____________ or have artistic integrity

6/17/2019 4:45pm

albums are dead. why should i put work into something like that if the majority of people who find it will choose one or two songs that they like. people don't listen to albums they listen to songs. there are no spotify playlists with full albums on them. the only problem is that some songs only work within the context of an album. i don't think i could listen to "us and them" if i wasn't already listening to dark side in its entirety.